Last weekend I flew with Air Berlin, Mallorca to Frankfurt. Three things I am fond of when flying within the EU: the free magazines and 
newspapers you get to choose from when entering the plane (that you will be stuck in with crying children, fat people sitting next to you who obviously did not take a shower from their last dip in the Sea and seem to still be dripping wet – eewww, or a group of teenagers who like to punch each other and sing songs because they are still drunk from their S’Arenal drinks garnished with four foot fluorescent straws).
Where was I? Right, things I enjoy when flying. Actually the only thing I really enjoy about flying is viewing the scenery below; Lake Geneva, the Alps in the distance, the green and yellow squares of farmland, my forehead is usually mashed to the window delighted with the sights. But the magazines, duty free shopping and Germans clapping after we have landed seem to make it a tad less aggravating.
People watching is fun too. God, do I love to stealthfully spy on our human race. Such fun! Though I try not to be an ass about it, I keep a legal distance and would never totally do a dead on stare. I do have my limits. geez. Granted, doing this while at the beach or in Palma drinking a cold beer is so more relaxing and enjoyable than the airport, but since I have to be here anyways…..
Germany was a whirl of Deutsche Spaß – we hung out with The German’s family and his new three week old niece (so cute), checked out a cool townhouse in Wesel, finally watched Twilight with Robert hotvampire Pattinson and took a walk to the top of the hill, sat on a bench and looked out over cloudy Detmold. I think I saw the sun for a total of thirty minutes on this trip. And while I never got the chance to wear my new summer dress from Mango I did get to break in my new Les Halles destroyed jeans by wearing them EVERY day. Classy, I know. But I love them.
We also hit up a steakhouse in Paderborn with friends and then went to see the famous window in the church across the cobblestone street. I don’t think you can go wrong with any church in Europe, they all seem so much more breathtaking and religious than any church I have ever been to in the U.S.A. Wait, I take that back – St Patrick’s Cathedral is beautiful. Okay, okay, I can think of a few more cathedrals in the land of glory but you know what I mean.
We hopped into the Paderborner Dom to see the Dreihasenfenster (that’s German for Window of Three Hares). It depicts hares (rabbits, bunnies, call them what you will) in motion, laid out in a triangle. Each wascally wabbit is shown as having two ears, although only three ears are visible in total. Cool, yes?
Somehow I always manage to learn a new obscure German word whenever I am in the country of wienerschnitzel. Before having steak I was told Lady Gaga showed accidently/on-purpose a/her little schniedelwutz. I think you can get what I am talking about, but it does mean a very VERY small one. Is that true? That is kind of a gross publicity stunt Lady Gaga but Das Bild declared it to be true, so it must be. Schniedelwutz.
And I learn another word. And have lost my appetite.
GOING NINETY MILES 
little scniedelwutz is better than big scniedelwutz